


Unwritten Rules

by orphan_account



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Domestic Violence, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mildly Dubious Consent, Sexual Content, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-21
Updated: 2015-03-21
Packaged: 2018-03-18 19:50:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3581778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus nodded. He had heard that promise before. ‘But maybe he means it this time. It sounds like he means it,’ the little voice in the back of his head supplied. He smiled weakly at his partner who was settling back to his spooning position- arms wrapped tightly around his body.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> More clarification on tags. This fic deals with an unhealthy relationship between the main characters herein. I've tried to tag all relevant tags, but feel free to message me with questions. Writing criticism is so welcome! (Fair warning: this is very much not britpicked and while it's not my first wolfstar fic, it's my first in oh three years.)

Looking around the bedroom he shared with the other marauders, two things were clear to Remus. First, that all the others had left for class without him. Second, that he was about to be very late. Recently, he had been very careful not to change in front of the others – using his years of hiding the wolf as solid practice for his current excuses and avoidance. 

He pulled his night clothes over his head and began searching for his clean robes. He hadn’t been feeling like himself recently. A fact which was clearly reflected in the way his once meticulously neat belongings were now hanging out of drawers and spread across the floor. 

As he searched, he tried not to bend over or stretch too much. The bruise covering his left side was blossoming in vibrant shades of green and purple and he didn’t want to irritate it more than necessary. It hurt to touch. It hurt to think about, quite frankly.

“What the bloody hell is _that_ , Remus?” Came James’ unexpected voice from across the room. 

“What?” Remus replied almost dropping the robes he had just found.

“Uh, the fricking huge bruise taking up your left side?” James responded as he managed to sound concerned even as he rolled his eyes.  
Remus felt ridiculous with the blush on his cheeks. ‘Play it cool,’ he thought to himself. 

“Oh, _that_.” He replied to James’ inquiry.

James’ brow furrowed at Remus’ nonchalance. 

“Yeah, _that_ ” He responded with renowned emphasis. “The huge can-be-seen-from-space bruise on your side. That, Moony. Why didn’t you say something after the full?”

Remus nodded quickly as he silently thanked whatever deity currently ruled that James had supplied his own explanation. 

“It’s no big deal! Trust me- it looks bad, but it feels fine.” He continued as he dressed as quickly as he could. The lie came easily to Remus’ practiced tongue.  
James remained clearly unconvinced. 

“Hey, mate. I’m already late for Potions. We could stop by Pomfrey’s and get the others to catch us up later.” James’ easily reassuring grin accompanied this sentiment as he moved as though to usher the taller boy to the door. 

Remus quickly grabbed his lesson supplies as the excuses tumbled quickly from his mouth.  
“Oh, really, it doesn’t hurt at all. And you know I can’t afford to miss a Potions class. And you know what Lily thinks of you skipping class. And I heard Slughorn was giving a quiz today. And it’s really no big…” Backing away from the other marauder, he failed to remember the bed behind him until he collided with it.  
The suspicion and concern commingled clearly on James’ Quidditch-tanned face. 

“Moony, you’re acting kinda weird. Even for you.” He stated as he moved toward where Remus was sitting on the floor trying to get his legs back under him. James stuck his hand out quickly- reaching toward Remus’ arm without warning. Instinctively, Remus flinched away causing him to knock his elbow into the bed. “Moony, what….?” James hissed in a half-whisper – confusion clear in both his voice and his body language. 

But in the next moment, Remus’ mind caught up with him. With werewolf speed, he was up on his feet and sliding past James and out the door.  
“Later, Prongs. I’ll talk to you later!” He shouted over his shoulder.

Left alone in the Marauders’ room, James absent-mindedly stared at the pile of Potion supplies that Remus had forgotten in a scattered pile beside his bed. A determined look settled on his face.  
*****************************************  
Hurrying down the hall, Remus chastised himself. He had known James since they were both eleven and if there was one thing he knew for sure was that James didn’t give up without a fight.

And now he was questioning Remus’ private business. Remus rolled his eyes. Sure, loyalty to his friends was one of James’ finer traits, but he didn’t need him in his private business. He was practically an adult, certainly older than James and had a lifetime worth of experience on dealing with his problems on his own. He could handle himself as he had done for so long before they met.  
*****************************************  
There was something wrong with Remus. James was certain of that much. The werewolf was practiced at keeping secrets, however, James was practiced at picking up on secrets. It was really the only way that one could end up being best friends with individuals with trust issues like Black and Lupin. ‘On the bright side,’ James thought to himself, ‘Padfoot will help me handle this.’ 

James had made plans to meet up with his friend who was practically his brother in the Room of Requirement. The meeting place made sense as it had been utilized by the marauders for secret meetings dozens upon dozens of times. When he entered the room, Sirius was already there lounging at a table and fixing his hair. James rolled his eyes. For as untamable James’ hair remained, Sirius always had every hair perfectly in place. “Prongs, love of my life!” Sirius crooned flirtatiously from his seat as his eyes lit up seeing the other marauder entering the room. 

“Padfoot, we’ve got to talk about _Moony_.” James responded with emphasis. He knew Black wasn’t one for serious conversations, however, he adored Moony.

Sirius’ eyes lost their shine at this as he started shifting in his seat to a semi-normal position. “What about him, Prongs?” 

“Pads, he’s got this fricking huge bruise! It takes up like his whole left side. I know you must have seen it before me, why didn’t he have Pomfrey look at it?” The messy-haired teen questioned with earnest eyes.

Sirius stared hard at the table in front of him. 

“I don’t know,” the response came. The normally vibrant colorful voice was cold and flat which made sense to James. 

‘I’d be pretty worried too, if my partner had that bruise.’ James thought to himself. “And it’s not just that, Pads. He’s been acting really strange lately. He tripped earlier and when I tried to help him up- he jumped like a foot away from me.” 

Sirius could hear the concern in his friend’s voice as he continued stare straight ahead at the table in front of him. “I don’t know, Prongs. I’ll talk to him.” Black hoped this half-truth would satisfy James’ curiosity. 

James nodded. “Maybe we should both talk to him? I mean, you remember how keeping the werewolf thing a secret stressed him out?”

A feeling of dread began filling Sirius’ body at that and he struggled to push it down. “No, don’t worry about it. I’ll talk to him tonight and let you know how it goes.” 

“Yeah, okay. That works," was the considerate answer.

Sirius sighed internally in relief at that.  
**************************************************************  
That night Sirius was determined to talk it over with Remus. Together, they had dealt with so much shit stemming from the Black family and Remus’ furry little problem. ‘We’ll get through this, too. Me and my Moony,’ the black-haired teen thought quietly to himself. After the other marauders had fallen asleep, he crawled into bed with the taller boy.

Lifting up the covers and adjusting the pillows, Sirius positioned himself so that he was spooning behind Remus. Sirius wasn’t good with expressing his emotions or feelings. He never had been- at least not in a way that others understood, but someone had shown him so long ago how to express what he felt for Remus. That he could do and surely the other boy would understand. So, he wrapped his Quidditch-toned arms around his partner, one arm around his collar-bone and the other around his lower chest (being extra careful with the bruise), pulled his legs in tight so that his groin was tight against the pert arse in front of him and slid an ankle between those sinfully delicious legs. 

“Oh, Moony,” he whispered as he began to feel himself growing hard. “ _My_ Moony…”

No response came, but Sirius could feel his lover’s heartbeat quicken and the heat of a blush begin to spread across his cheeks as he stiffened slightly. That was an indication to Sirius that his meaning was understood.

He eagerly pulled down the pants which were blocking his access to that perfectly structured body before him. Pushing down his own just far enough, he pulled out his own cock and began rubbing himself against the warm-flesh before him. He grabbed the other marauder closer as he began rocking his hips in earnest.

“Merlin’s bones, yes…” He hissed into his partner’s ear as he lined up his cock with the shallow cleft of that glorious arse and his body seemed to move on its own. There was no danger of penetration from this angle, but thrusting up and down as he worked himself was more than enough. “Oh, Merlin, you’re mine, Moony, all mine…” he whispered. 

With his body, he communicated that message. That Moony belonged with him- to him. That he would _never_ let him go. As he neared completion, his hand worked its way around his partner’s neck and held that wonderful body perfectly still until it hit him from deep inside – painfully good.

He’d heard it called making love and he thought in the moments after with Remus that he finally understood why.After finishing, he pulled up both sets of boxers and sat up a bit. “Moony, we need to talk.” He softly ordered.

“Can’t it wait until morning, Sirius?” Remus asked. The trace of water in his voice only made Sirius more determined to have this conversation as soon as possible.

“No, Moony. It can’t. We need to talk. Prongs came to me today and he seemed really worried about you.” He retorted. 

Remus could feel the heat of Sirius’ eyes staring at him. He squeezed his eyes tightly together. “Mm,” was the only appropriate response which came to his mind.

“What did you tell him?” Sirius’ voice was soft, but the sound of an accusation was unmistakable. 

“Nothing, Sirius. I told you I wouldn’t.”

Sirius sighed deeply. “That’s good. I told him I’d talk to you. Please don’t worry about it, Moons. There’s nothing to worry about. You know I love you, right?”

Remus nodded silently. He knew that. Of course Sirius loved him, everyone knew that. They were always telling Remus how lucky he was to have a boyfriend who was so crazy about him and so dedicated to their relationship.

Sirius smiled broadly. His smile was his characteristic which was most typical of the Black family- broad- too broad, teeth showing in the corners and the light in his eyes bordering on mania. 

“Good Moony. And I promise- it’ll never happen again. I promise.”

Remus nodded. He had heard that promise before. ‘But maybe he means it this time. It sounds like he means it,’ the little voice in the back of his head supplied. He smiled weakly at his partner who was settling back to his spooning position- arms wrapped tightly around his body. “You’re too tight, Sirius,” he whispered as softly as he could.

“Sorry, Moony,” came the reply as the other marauder loosened his arms and placed a kiss softly on his partner’s neck.”

Remus sighed quietly. ‘It’s okay,’ he thought to himself. ‘I love him and it’s okay.’  
**********************************************************************************  
The other Marauders had been thrilled for Sirius and Remus when they had begun dating a few months earlier. “It’s about time!” James had smiled as he stood between them- hugging one from each side. Peter had blinked uneasily for a few seconds as his eyes switched between the two before apparently reaching a decision. “Well, if you’re happy!” He shrugged with a smile. 

Remus remembered how wonderful everything had been at first. Sirius was always so attentive. At every full moon, he had a plan to get “his Moony” through it and the next few days. At first it seemed nice that Sirius was so involved. “I just want to make sure you’re safe. You can leave it all to me.” And, “You know how out of it you are after the full, let me take care of you.” This sentimentality appealed to Remus at first- the appeal of just letting Sirius take care of everything and make all the decisions. However, the appeal was short-lived, as it quickly spread to other aspects of his life.

But he didn’t want to say anything to Sirius, whose sensitivity was legendary amongst the Marauders, even well-known amongst the other Gryffindors. Remus blamed it on growing up in the Black family, but his boyfriend was known to take any comment that was not clearly complimentary as an insult and was more than capable of holding a grudge. On the rare times that James was critical of Sirius’ performance on the Quidditch field, Remus had to deal with the aftermath- the thrown books, the punched walls, the broken glass.

Remus was slowly growing used to it as he no longer bothered to try and keep his place as neat as he was accustomed to. ‘What’d be the point?’ He came to wonder to himself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashback to the beginning of Sirius and Remus' relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same note as before. This deals with an unhealthy relationship and this fic is not britpicked. Message me with questions/concerns.

Sirius had been on edge all day. He wasn’t even certain why. Since the time he had woken up, a warm sense of anger had filled his skin just below the surface. Every little thing seemed to irritate him. The aura of anger around him seemed almost physical. He’d just snapped at the other marauders for no reason. He’d left the common room in a huff and headed out to find someplace he could be alone.

He was headed to the room of requirement where he hoped to find some relief from how he was feeling. If he’d been forced to describe it, he would have said he was so angry it hurt. It ached in his chest and the tips of his fingers. He’d bitten into the back of his bottom lip, resisting the urge to let some of the ache out. The angry voices in his head sounded like harpies hissing and clawing at everything pure they found. He was almost to his destination when he heard a familiar voice out of the corner.

“Isn’t that your _brother_ , Regulus? The Gryffindor bicycle?” came the high-pitched voice of one Severus Snape.

“You know very well, _Severus_ , that I don’t have a brother _and_ I don’t associate with common whores.”

Sirius recognized that voice. He’d sung lullabies together with that voice because no one else would. He remembered that voice asking him for stories before they fell asleep at night. He squeezed his fist tight with the nails pressing into the skin. He looked forward to never hearing that voice again.

He sighed audibly with relief when he entered the room of requirement. Stacks of glass dishes greeted him and well, that was exactly what he needed to relieve himself of some of the anger which was threatening to swallow him. He couldn’t see straight as he started throwing glass, breaking it against the table where it had been resting and soon he was outside himself. He was somewhere else- somewhere calm as his body acted out the ache that he held inside.  
***********************************************************************************  
Sirius had been on edge all day. Remus wasn’t sure why, but since his boyfriend had woken up that morning, he had been responding with irritation to almost everything. You didn’t have to know the dark-haired wizard at all to sense the anger boiling just beneath his skin. He’d been snapping at his friends for no reason. The final straw seemed to be Peter laughing at some lame homophobic joke that someone told in the common room. Black had stormed off in a huff after giving the other marauder a look that looked deadly, even to those it hadn’t been fixed on. 

Remus sighed to himself, he had planned on spending the night with his homework and not chasing after his boyfriend. He had thought that when he started dating Sirius almost two weeks ago that he would become less stressed. It was no secret to anyone that Sirius could be high-strung (when he wasn’t redefining carefree), but today had been ridiculous. Out of the corner of his eye, Remus spotted Regulus Black, Severus Snape and a few other Slytherins hanging in the corner laughing at something. ‘Something stupid, no doubt.’ Remus thought to himself with a roll of his eyes. But he knew too well how even seeing his brother could darken Sirius’ mood for days.

When he entered the room of requirement, the first thing he noticed was the sound of crunching glass beneath his feet. The second was his boyfriend mumbling incoherently to himself as he threw plates against the wall. And the third…. The third was that Sirius’ hands were red. “Blood,” the wolf registered the scent almost instantly. His boyfriend’s hands were covered in blood. With a burst of adrenaline, he was at the shorter boy’s side.

“I’m not. I’m not. I’m not,” Sirius mumbled to himself- repeating it almost like a chant.

Remus’ face wrinkled in uncertainty and worry. 

“Padfoot?” he began in a shaky voice as he reached for the bloody hands before him. He looked up into his boyfriend’s eyes- noticing their glassy shine.  
Sirius jumped away from him with a start and seemed to finally realize that he was no longer alone. 

“What do you want, Moony?” He asked. His voice sounded strange and scratchy.

“I wanted to see if you were okay, Padfoot,” He tried to reassure.

“I’m bloody well fine,” Sirius snapped back at him.

“You don’t look fine, love. Can I see your hands?” the taller boy whispered calmly holding out his own.

“Not your problem.” Sirius responded as he reached for another plate.

The blood was still dripping down his palms and fingertips. Lupin couldn’t tell what was cut and what was simply caked with blood. There was simply no way that he could imagine letting Sirius pick up another plate.

“C’mon, love. Put it down,” he coaxed gently reaching for the plate.

“Bugger. Off,” was the reply as the shorter boy threw the plate against the wall where it shattered into a medley of pieces. Without his eyes leaving the wall, he reached for another.

Remus did the only thing he could think to do in the current situation. He needed to fix those hands. He needed to know what was wrong with his boyfriend and the only way to accomplish that would be to get his attention. So, he placed his hands on the shorter boy’s shoulders and as gently as he could began turning him toward himself.

Sirius had exploded with anger. Remus half-remembered reading that expression somewhere before, but he had never understood it until that moment.  
“Don’t bloody touch me!” he howled and before Remus could react, he had lifted his fist and swung with his concentrated anger. He connected with Remus’ gut causing him to double over.

The world seemed to stop for the pair as all of the air in the room was sucked out of it. 

“Jesus…!” Remus swore as he held the edge of the table and struggled to breath.

“Shite, Moony,” Sirius whispered and reached for the other boy.

“Back off, Sirius,” Remus hissed as he stayed leaning over the table. His mind was swimming with questions ‘What do I do? How did this happen? What did I do wrong?’

“Fuck, Moony, I’m sorry. It was an accident. I was just so surprised. I wasn’t thinking! It was an accident. I’d never hurt you on purpose. Never. You have to believe me,” the dark-haired boy pleaded and promised with tears in his eyes and blood-stained hands.  
***********************************************************************************************************

Sunlight had already filled the room with a subtle heat when Remus awoke. He wasn’t sure how late it was, but he was fairly certain he’d slept into the afternoon. He’d spent the evening into the wee hours doing research in the library. ‘Not hiding out- I just needed some time,’ he reasoned with himself. ‘I still need some time to figure out how to fix this.’

The door to the room opened with a squeaky groan.

“Hey, Moony?” Sirius called in a strained voice. He was clearly nervous. 

Sitting up in his ruffled sheets, the taller marauder ran his fingers through his hair as he straightened up in his bed. “Yeah, Sirius?” he asked.

The black-haired boy shuffled his feet. “I brought you something, if you’re ready to talk” and pulled from behind his back a box of chocolates in a ridiculously large box. 

Remus shrugged half-heartedly. “Yeah, c’mon over here,” he replied with a motion to the bed over the side of which he was swinging his feet.

The other marauder settled beside him on the bed and quietly handed him the box he had brought. He swallowed audibly and sighed before he began. 

“ Moons, about last night,” Here he paused and broke eye contact and stared intently at the wall before continuing. “I’m sorry. It was an accident. I was just so wound up, you know? And you wouldn’t let it go…. It’s just…. I think we both made mistakes. But I promise that’ll never happen again. I love you and I need you to trust me,” As he finished, he laid his lips firmly over the other’s- his kiss was hot and his teeth brushed against Remus’ lips.

When he pulled away, he held gaze with the green-eyes before him. “Tell me you forgive me, Moony. Please?”

Remus nodded quietly. ‘He was so upset and I should have known better than to touch him when he was like that. Besides, he looks so sorry and it’s not like I don’t go through twice as bad every month,’ he considered before opening his mouth to reply.

“Of course I do, Sirius. I know you didn’t mean it,” he reassured.  
************************************************************************************  
Things had gone well for the next week. The marauders continued on as ever with pranks and plans- the only difference being two of them shared a bed and stole occasional kisses, but everything was okay. Until, one day, it wasn’t. 

The couple had been walking back to the Gryffindor common room, hand-in-hand when Remus heard someone call his name. Glancing behind him, he saw Kingsley coming up the hall. 

“Hey, how’s it going?” he responded. While Remus and the Slytherin were not the closest of friends, they had remained amiable after a short relationship during Fourth Year. 

“Hey, I just wanted to ask you if you had gotten the Potions homework? I seem to have misplaced the book I wrote it down in,” Shacklebolt explained in his deep voice.

“Yeah… It’s in my room….” Remus began, but paused as the gentle hold that Sirius had on his hand became a vice grip.

“Get it from Snivellus- you room together,” The grey-eyed teen broke in with quiet steel in his voice.

“Yeah but, we’re not exactly on speaking terms right now….” The broad-shouldered Slytherin replied, moving his eyes between the couple before him.

“That sounds like a personal problem. Let’s go, Moony,” the shorter boy answered, not even looking at either boy as he pulled the green-eyed boy toward him by his wrist he was now holding.

Remus had held his breath until they reached the room that they shared with the other marauders. He could tell from the tight hold that Sirius’ had on his wrist and the tense way he was holding his shoulders that something was upsetting him. The door behind them slammed with a thud and Sirius threw silencing and locking spells.  
“Sirius, what’s wrong?” Remus asked in confusion. Everything had been so fine a second ago.

He squeezed his eyes tight together as the grey-haired boy threw his new collection of Julius Verne at the door with a loud, “Krack!”

He flinched when the other boy whirled around to face him- he could feel the anger coming off of him in waves.

“What’s wrong? What’s wrong, Moony? How about the fact that Slytherin scum was _fucking_ you with his eyes?” was the shouted response.

“Sirius he… he just wanted the homework…” Remus stuttered, unsure of how to respond.

“Merlin, Moony! Are you actually that bloody naïve? It was downright obscene the way he was looking at you,” Sirius growled grabbing his boyfriend’s scarred wrists in his hands and glaring into his eyes. “I don’t want you talking to him again.”

“What? Sirius, don’t you think you’re overreacting? He’s my friend…” Remus protested loudly. He knew they were in a relationship, but you couldn’t simply forbid him talking to people.

Even his werewolf reflexes didn’t anticipate the slap as Sirius’ flat hand crashed against his cheek.

“He’s not your _friend_! He’s a creep! Don’t talk to him, don’t go near him, Moons!” the black-haired boy screamed in the taller boy’s face. 

However, the world had stopped for Remus as he moved his hand toward his face. As he laid his fingertips on his cheek, he could feel the heat radiating off of where the hand had struck him. 

Sirius sighed in frustration and placed a gentle kiss on the other boy’s cheek. “I’m sorry, Moony, it just worries me sometimes how innocent you are and I don’t want anyone to take advantage of you.”  
******************************************************************************************************************************************

At first, Remus didn’t know what would set off the tangible anger in his partner, but then he started to notice the cycle- the unwritten rules of their relationship.

_Sirius_ had to initiate all touching.

Only _Sirius_ could be friends with his exes.

He was to never indicate that he wondered about _Sirius_ ’ romantic past.

_Sirius_ was in control in bed.

If Remus had been truthful with himself, he would have noticed that the relationship revolved around Sirius and his needs, but he saw it through a love-tinted gaze. ‘It was hard for him growing up in that house,’ and ‘That’s the only way he knows how to show that he cares,’ bounced around in his mind until those excuses were just as ingrained as those unwritten rules.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can be reached at http://strippingwizardsonabartop.tumblr.com/.

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is at http://strippingwizardsonabartop.tumblr.com if you want to message me there.


End file.
